Perimenopause: When You Feel Rubbish About Yourself and Finally Take Time Back for You

Perimenopause is a transitional stage that affects far more than periods or hormones. Many women across Chorley and Lancashire experience changes in mood, confidence, skin and self-identity during this time, often feeling disconnected from themselves after years of caring for others. Understanding perimenopause as a whole-body and emotional shift — not a personal failing — is the first step toward reclaiming wellbeing and prioritising self-care without guilt.

Why Do I Suddenly Feel So Unlike Myself?

For many women, perimenopause doesn’t arrive with a clear announcement. Instead, it creeps in quietly. You may feel more tired, more self-critical, less confident or emotionally flat — even if life on paper looks “fine.”

What’s unsettling is that these feelings often don’t come with an obvious reason. You may simply feel that something has shifted, and you’re not entirely sure where you went.

Perimenopause Is More Than a Hormonal Change

Hormonal fluctuations during perimenopause affect far more than the reproductive system. Oestrogen plays a role in mood regulation, sleep, skin quality, cognition and emotional resilience.

As levels fluctuate, many women experience increased anxiety, low mood, reduced motivation and a sense of emotional overwhelm — particularly if they have spent most of their adult life being the reliable one.

When You’ve Spent a Lifetime Caring for Others

Many women entering perimenopause have spent years — sometimes decades — prioritising everyone else. Children, partners, parents, careers, patients, clients.

You’ve been the organiser, the supporter, the one who keeps everything moving. Somewhere along the way, your own needs were postponed — not intentionally, but consistently.

Perimenopause often removes the buffer that allowed you to keep doing that without cost.

Why Confidence Often Takes a Hit

Changes in skin, body composition, energy levels and emotional regulation can quietly erode self-esteem. You may feel less comfortable in your body or more critical of your appearance, even if nothing dramatic has changed.

This isn’t vanity. It’s grief for a version of yourself that felt easier to inhabit.

Feeling “Rubbish” Is Not a Failure

One of the most important things to understand is this: feeling flat, disconnected or fed up during perimenopause is not a weakness.

It’s a signal. A biological and emotional request to slow down, reassess and finally include yourself in the care you give so freely to others.

Why Taking Time for Yourself Feels So Hard

For many women, prioritising themselves feels indulgent or unjustified. There’s often an internal narrative of “I’ll do it when things calm down,” or “others need me more.”

Perimenopause has a way of making that narrative unsustainable. The body and mind simply won’t cooperate anymore.

Self-Care Isn’t About Indulgence — It’s About Regulation

True self-care during perimenopause isn’t about surface-level pampering. It’s about regulating the nervous system, restoring skin and body confidence, and creating moments where you are not required to perform or provide.

Professional treatments, quiet time, routine, and intentional care become stabilising anchors — not luxuries.

How Skin and Wellbeing Treatments Can Help

During perimenopause, skin often becomes drier, more reactive or less resilient. Treatments that focus on hydration, repair and collagen support help restore comfort and confidence.

Equally important is the environment — calm, unrushed, respectful. Feeling looked after allows the nervous system to soften, which has a knock-on effect on mood and wellbeing.

Reclaiming Yourself Without Guilt

Taking time for yourself during perimenopause is not selfish. It is restorative. It allows you to continue showing up — but not at the expense of yourself.

This stage of life isn’t about becoming less. It’s about becoming more intentional.

A Gentle Reframe

Perimenopause isn’t the beginning of decline. It’s a recalibration. A moment where your body and mind ask you to finally turn some of your care inward.

And that is not something to apologise for.

Book a Consultation in Chorley

If perimenopause has left you feeling disconnected from yourself — emotionally, physically or in your skin — we offer a calm, supportive space to help you reconnect and feel like you again.

To book your consultation, contact us at
info@mollieeliseaesthetics.com
07365 188866

At Mollie Elise Aesthetics, we believe caring for yourself is not a luxury — it’s a necessity.